To my future wife,
I don’t know who you are, where you are, or what you’re doing, but I just want to say that I love you. There are no words I could say, in any language, no picture I could send, no song I could sing to really make you understand just how much I do. Every single day I wish that I’ll meet you. Bump into you at the mall, sit beside you in class, stand behind you in line at a coffee shop even though I hate coffee, hell, even swipe right on you on Tinder.
A lot of me hopes that you’re reading this, now.
Ever since I was a kid, I’ve dreamed about you. Dreamed about getting to know every little thing about you: Favorite kind of food? Coke or Pepsi? Favorite color? What do you want to do with your life? Where do you want to live? What’s your favorite book? What’s your favorite movie? What gets you fired up? What makes you laugh? What inspires you? These are just a few things to list, but I want to know absolutely everything, all your likes, your dislikes, how you laugh, how you cry, how your smile lights up the room when you’re happy, and how heartbreaking it looks when you’re sad…. I want to know how you got that scar on your knee, and kiss it as if I was there when you first got it. I want to know all the pain from your past, all the people who broke your heart, all the regrets you have, so I can take it all away and help you remember how it feels to be loved again. I know that I won’t be able to learn all these things in a few months, not even in a few years, it will take a lifetime to get to know you, because we grow and change every day, and I can’t wait to be beside you through it all, falling more and more in love with the person you become every single day.
There are so many things I can’t wait for. I want to dance to your favorite song with you, binge watch your favorite show on the couch with you at 2am, bring you food from your favorite restaurant when you’ve had a bad day. I want to grab a beer with your dad, take your mom shopping, let your sister do my brows, and take your brother shooting. I want to take care of you and your best friend when you get too drunk, and apologize for puking on your shoes when I am. But the thing I look forward to the most? Kissing you for the first time. When I kiss you, I’ll kiss you like I’ve never kissed anyone before. I’ll take my time, I’ll do it slow, I’ll pull you in, push your hair behind your ear, put your face in my hands, and kiss you stupid, kiss you till you’ve forgotten where you are, till your knees are weak, and when I pull away, you’ll be speechless. There will be no words, you’ll just look into my eyes, and see peace.
I know I don’t know you, but these are my solemn vows to you:
I promise to always be your best friend, no matter what. To always be an idiot with you and embarrass ourselves when we’re out in public. Always be that nauseating couple that everyone hates, no matter how old we are. To never spoil the show we’re watching, when I’m ahead of you. To always give you my jacket when you’re cold, and if I don’t have one, to just hug the shit out of you while we walk, because I’m basically a human heater. To burst in when you’re showering every once in a while, just to kiss you no matter how soaked my clothes get. To always be spontaneous and keep that spark alive. To take you places you’ve always wanted to go, and show you places you never knew existed. That every day I will always let you know how beautiful and sexy you are to me even if you don’t believe it. To always take care of you and kiss you when you’re sick, no matter how snotty and gross you look, and even at the risk of getting sick myself. Because kissing you will always be worth that risk. That I’ll try to never let you go to bed upset, but if you do, you’ll always wake up to breakfast in bed. I promise to always hold you when you cry. To always carry you and tuck you into bed when you get too drunk. To always shoulder your burdens, ease your fears, and share in your triumphs. To let you fight your own battles, but be there to step in when you need help. To always encourage you, ignite your passions, and push you to follow your dreams, even if that means I’m put on the back burner for a bit. I promise to love your family just as much as I love mine because they are my family, too.
The one thing I can’t promise is that I’ll never make you mad, or sad, but I promise I’ll always fix it. Last, but not least, I promise to love you… for all that you are…all that you’ve been…and all you are yet to be.
I know, if and when you read this, you’re going to so say that you’re going to hold me to these things, and that’s good. I hope you do because it’s all these things and more that I’m going to do to try and show you just how much I love you.
Your future husband
This isn’t the best thing I’ve ever written, I really wish it was, but I didn’t say anywhere near everything I wanted to say, the transitions are terrible, the thoughts are scattered, the wording sucks, but that’s just how much I love you. Even though I don’t know who you are, even just the thought of you makes me dumb, because I am just stupid in love with you.
Letter from odyssey